As I announced on my Facebook fan page recently, I am going inactive on Fitocracy. Here’s why…
Although a worthwhile and arguably kick-ass idea, Fitocracy appears to be 90% iron pumping triathlon winning fitness ninjas and 10% fitness newbies. I may revisit my decision in the future, but after careful consideration and a few experiences that made me shake my head…I’m done for now. To those of you who followed me there and enthusiastically participated in our group challenges, I wholeheartedly apologize if I have disappointed you. I love you all dearly and I truly appreciate your support as I go through this process of attaining the healthy lifestyle I’m striving for.
Please allow me to offer the following evidence as I state my case…
Exhibit A: Naked people. While impressive, keep your naked ass off my computer – especially if I’m cruising for quests and challenges at work. People do post naked pictures of their expertly, if not overly sculpted physiques. I’m just not into that. At all.
Exhibit B: Fitocrats hitting on Fitocrats. Ya know…I’d go to the gym if I wanted to see that. Save the “Let’s get together for a romantic dinner of Muscle Milk” for someplace where the rest of us don’t have to watch.
Exhibit C: Speaking in tongues. You know that feeling when you take your car to the mechanic and they check it out, then walk up to you with what looks like a grease covered apple wedger and say “Your squinky squank’s got malnagging boogle parts in it and they’ve all gotta be replaced”? You just stand there and blink, wondering what the hell they just said, right? Check out this actual update that showed up on my feed one day:
This has been driving me crazy all day. I read a t-nation post about avoiding Britany Spears syndrome, thick waist from isolating abs and obliques all day every day. He recommends a female, wanting to lose weight, carb cycle with a (c/p/f) 60/30/10, 10/30/60 split with high fat days are lifting days (ish) and the carb day is a rest day (4 day cycle). I have been doing a lean gains recomp for 6 weeks and have had good results. I want to start a cut but now I’m questioning my macros.
I must have read it 5 times, all the while wondering to myself how many Power Bars a person has to eat to get that jacked up. I can’t relate. I don’t want to relate. I don’t want to live in a world where “Britany Spears Syndrome” is a real affliction…so piss off!
Further, very soon after I became a “Fitocracy Hero” (thanks to all of you joining me there and winning me that extra badge) I was sorry to see several seasoned members
posting whining about the fact that so many new people would be joining at the start of the new year…which was made even worse because Dr. Oz had decided to endorse Fitocracy. There was a lot of snobbery and eye-rolling going on at the prospect of having to deal with new members – something I thought was kind of shitty, for lack of a better term.
I don’t begrudge the Fitocrats their place on the internet and I completely applaud them for doing what they love to do, but I have to be around people I can relate to…and I can’t relate to them. I’m sorry if you’re disappointed…and I hope you forgive me. If it helps, I’m mentally wishing each of you to win a million hundred dollars and a lap dance from Hugh Jackman.
I’ll be back by Sunday to tell you all about The Path. I hope that sounds mysteriously awesome…because it’s supposed to.