7 Days of Sanity: Day 5…I’m not wearing pants!

It’s Day 5 of 7 Days of Sanity…and, it’s true, I’m not wearing pants. 

Calm down.  Think rationally.  Of course I’m not going to go running around my office completely uncovered.  But this morning I didn’t slip on the typical frumpy, dumpy fat girl pants that I usually have to wear to work.  And, no, for Heaven’s sake…I’m not wearing a skirt or a dress.  Cankles, hello! 

(drumroll….)

This morning, I put on (and zipped) the first pair of jeans I’ve worn in 2 years.  

TWO YEARS!!!!!

Our office is closed tomorrow for Good Friday, so today is our last day before the weekend.  Fridays are always jeans day at the office.  I don’t have a pair of size 32 jeans and I have refused to buy any because I have a whole bunch of size 30 clothes in my closet just waiting for me.  As such, I’ve never worn jeans at this job.  Unlike most offices, we don’t get to participate in Jeans Day unless we donate $5 for the designated charity for that week.  Every Friday is kind of like a nagging little reminder that I’m a big fat fatty…because someone comes through the department to check and see who’s wearing jeans and who has to pay up.  And…every Friday…I say “I’m not wearing jeans.”  And every Friday, there’s this tiny little voice that reminds me that I’m not wearing jeans because I can’t fit into the ones in my closet.  It’s something that makes me fight to stay positive.  I tell that little voice to shut up…and I remind myself that I’m working on it. 

Sure, I could have gone out to buy bigger jeans, but I have adamantly refused to buy bigger clothes for myself and I’m sticking to it.  I’ve burned that bridge.  In fact, I’ll show you what I did with my last pair of size 32 jeans…tomorrow.  It’s pretty funny.  

But today…I am incredibly proud to be the girl who’s lost 32 pounds and is wearing size 30 jeans at work.  32 marbles have gone plink, plink, plink in the jar.  187 marbles are waiting to be moved.  And they will move.  It’s all in my power.

I’ll leave you guys with this for today:  me in my jeans at work.  Still a big fat girl, I know…but working on it every day and moving forward no matter how hard my personal demons try to throw me off course.  I’ve got this.

Today, I am a Hot Mess Bad Ass.

25 thoughts on “7 Days of Sanity: Day 5…I’m not wearing pants!

  1. You look beautiful!  You are such an inspiration…thanks for sharing your story.  I have about 85 lbs to lose and it seems so discouraging sometimes.  I admire your honesty and bravery!

  2. Love your site, I have about 125 to lose and together, we will do it, thanks for the encouragement.   You look awesome, keep up the great job

  3. I know what a fantastic feeling that is!!! Congrats on that MILESTONE!!! I’m hoping to lose another 80 within a year!!! Don’t you feel fantastic after going on the treadmill?!? I bet giving your $5 felt extra special today!! Keep up the great work, you are such a motivator!!

  4. Yay!!! What a wonderful accomplishment! Nothing sucks more than buying bigger clothes.. except looking at yourself naked in the dressing room full length mirror. Anyway – congrats, girl!! You rock!!! 

  5. You are beautiful. Really. And congrats! I’m competing with you, by the way… I’m another Texas girl who needed to lose more than 100 🙂 Hope you don’t mind. I was winning until just recently, when you pulled ahead of my 30 with your 32. Well done! 

  6. Look at you, Hot Mess Bad Ass!!!!  Go, girl, GO!!!!  So amazing….and so PROUD of you!!!    

  7. You look so great and I am so proud of you!!! I know it’s an amazing feeling. You’re such an inspiration every day. You’re also a beautiful woman inside and out!!! 🙂

  8. You look so cute – your smile is worth a million bucks.  You really look different than when you started this journey.  Congrats!

  9. GO YOU!! I just stumbled across your blog, and it’s so inspiring!!  I’ve got 85lbs to go, and my sisters and I just started Weight Watchers. I’t worked really well for us so far! I look forward to watching you progress with your goals! Good luck! 🙂

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